"it's spring fever...."

looks like a pretty spring break place

lovely to know these places still exist in London

I love this representation of spring.. young and carefree

What does spring mean to you?


Carol xo

"... you don't quite know what it is you DO want,

but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so!"

~ Mark Twain




images from google

pieces of good news

Good news, good news all around!!!

1) I have been selected to be one of the 'givers' on 5 March 2011, for World Book Night.  It's a move to distribute 1,000,000 books across the country to get people reading.  There are 25 titles in all, and the one I am giving away is 'Life of Pi'.  I hadn't read any of the books, but I had heard that this one was particularly noteworthy.  To apply (back in November or December), I had to state why it was this book in particular that I wished to give away to 48 people.


I forget the details now, but 'Life of Pi' revolves around a boat story, and I know one of those already.  For those of you who don't know, basically the 'boat story' is the story of how my parents got to England.  Over the past few years, I have become more and more interested in my family's lives, and what it was like before I was born.  This 'boat story' moved me when I first heard it, and it still does every time I tell someone or I hear it.  And I thought that I could help to move others, as they share in the 'boat story' in 'Life of Pi'.  Now I have to figure out a way to distribute them.

2) P and I are very slack on gift-getting, and have decided to renew our Valentine's Day gift amnesty. (Why would you pick one day to buy your loved one a gift?  Surely if you loved them, you wouldn't need one day of the whole year to make extra special effort?)  I got my Christmas present! Finally.  I have conflicting ideas about gifts, but I picked these out myself which is probably why I love them lots :-D Our gift exchange involved online shopping, so whilst I still have overvalued ideas about things girls should have as they pass into adulthood, I picked things out from one website only (not my idea).

3) Organised a Chinese New Year dinner for my friends and I last weekend in Chinatown.  It was surprising that people turned up for a celebration of something most of them don't celebrate, compared to turn out for people's birthdays.  Anyway, I wore my cheongsam, which P bought for me in Hong Kong - apparently it took him a long time to find.  I was and still am one of those people who loves to wear new things as soon as I have bought / received / got them, but even I know there is a time and a place for a cheongsam.  Now I need to figure out a way to work the kimono into my normal socially acceptable wardrobe.  Hm.. National Foundation Day is in a few days.....




4) It is Chinese New Year tomorrow!

新年快樂

Xīnnián kuàilè

Carol
xoxo




all images from google

i don't care what they say

So as usual, there's always a huge lapse between my posts where I talk about my daily life.  It's the last day of the Christmas holidays today, which was something I needed very much.  At first, it was odd having a break (as I am always someone who likes to keep busy or keep doing something even during down-time) but then I got used to it, and being at home and having family time and being able to eat what I want without having to go to the shop to buy it, and have my clothes washed etc.  I always maintain that it is a very good experience to live away from home, fully, without being in easy travelling distance of being near your parents/family, because then it forces you to look after yourself, and work out how to use those machines in your house that your family always took care of, like the washing machine and the oven etc.  

Maybe it's just in my stereotyped role, but I always thought washing machines were fairly self explanatory.  I am in no way boasting about my domestic abilities, by the way.

My holidays have been spent studying, having fun, being cold and trying not to eat too much food.  I think that everytime my parents see me, they think I have lost weight.  I suppose that's just what they expect, as I don't have conventional eating patterns.  Anyway, having six months of study and constantly being busy... it felt weird at first to have all this free time, but I've gotten used to it - I needed it.  And now I have that 'last day of the holiday' feeling.. I don't feel ready to go back to school, but I guess that's just because of all the time off I have had!  Before I left at the train station to come back to London, I met up with one of my best friends, and we had a really good but too brief chat.  She now works for the Office of National Statistics, and she was telling me about meeting Ray Mears - she came top in her year for her subject at her university.

I had a bizarre dream this morning too.  I've not written about one in a while, so I thought I would now.  I was in my school cafeteria, where everyone had to go for lunch unless they were in the sixth form, with one of my friends who I saw during the holidays, and some old friends from school who I no longer keep in touch with.  We were buying lunch, and one of my friends, K, with whom I had some academic rivalry when I first knew her, but then we did different subjects and moved in different friend circles.  She asked me to get my book on SLE (systemic lupus erythematosus - a multisystemic disease, which is quite rare, but often you see manifestations of the disease in a mild way in some rheumatology clinics.  It is quite interesting, and is often used in exam cases) for her from my locker, which was just outside the cafeteria room, so I went and unlocked it, but for some reason, I pulled out a green book, and I thought it was the SLE book.  So I went into the food area (where K was) and put the book on her tray.  We went to sit down, but one of my friends wasn't happy with where we were sat for some reason (?) and made us move nearer to the windows and told us where to sit, in a certain configuration, which made her happy to do so.  K came to sit with us, and she realised that the book I had given her was not the SLE book (which was orange); she'd noticed it was the green book which I absent-mindedly pulled from my bag in my locker - it was my Psychiatry book instead.  I didn't feel like getting up to get the book she actually wanted, and she got a bit angry and, I guess, through the power of her negative thought, 'sent' me to a hospital clinic....

I'm starting with a GP rotation, which I feel a bit apprehensive about, more than starting the  other attachments I've done thusfar, but hopefully it will turn out to be okay.  Mine is a bit far away, so I am not looking forward to 8am starts, but I've done it before, so it should be fun.

Hope you've all had a good start to 2011... there are a lot of things to look forward to.  Lots of stories to come, films to see, places to go.. it should be good.

Carol x

PS. Do you remember these songs???  I've been listening to old songs for a few days; they bring back many memories. (by old, I mean 9 or 10 or more years)

de nouvelles choses

Whether or not you believe that a new year can really signify the start of something new or that it's an arbitrary date, 2011 certainly seems to be a year that a lot of people are looking forward to.  To be fair, the past few years, globally and nationally have not been all that amazing - there have been good things but it has been vastly overshadowed by some darker and gloomier things.  So it comes as no surprise that people are looking to the future.


When I was younger, I used to make New Year's Resolutions.  They would be unexciting things, like, go to bed at x hour every night, wake up at x hour every morning, exercise every day... do well at school etc etc. As the years went by, I gave up making a list, and so the past few years, I have looked forward to the New Year with the continuing resolution of being happy with my life and everything in it.  I didn't feel the need to mark the new year's arrival with resolutions, when I could just be resolving to do something when I want, regardless of the date.


I would like to think that as each year passes, I mature a little and become a little bit wiser, and that I continue to be happy with my life, and the way I am living it.


Are you making any New Year's Resolutions?  What are you looking forward to in 2011?


Carol xoxo

Christmas Eve!!!!

I am writing to you on Christmas Eve, one of the best nights of the year... I hope you are all home and warm, having lots of fun! :)  I've been home for 5 days now and done lots of productive things.


There's been less of a festive feeling this year, despite all the decorations being up for months and months, and me actually buying Christmas presents before Christmas (for P's parents) but maybe that's just because I was so busy in the weeks before I came home.  We have lots of snow and slush and ice... it's just as Christmas should be.  In the minus degrees, with lots of warm things, lots of food and a lot of happy times.  I hope this Christmas brings you lots of festive cheer, wherever you are reading this right now and lots of cosy memories.


Contrary to previous years, I shall not have a rant about the increasing commercialisation of Christmas and gift giving, but instead I shall say 圣诞快乐 ♥


festive love,
Christmas Carol xoxo
♥ 


PS. These are my two favouritest Christmas songs... nothing less than what you would expect from me!!!

'My Only Wish' by Britney Spears - the girly choice

'What's This?' by Fall Out Boy - the emo choice

it turned into an art not to show the world that it was you

Saw P off today.  It started snowing very very badly about 10.30 which was a pain, and then I haven't left the house since I returned just after 11am... it's too cold to go out and the snow was bad.  It was okay in the afternoon but I thought, hmm, maybe not.  People get really excited about snow, particularly in London (?) where it messes up transport a lot, and people get all het up about it, like they've never seen snow before?  Maybe it's just because I am from the North... snow was pretty much a many-times-a-year occurrence for me, and we all deal with it just fine, even though there is significantly less salt/grit stuff.


Watched BBC's adaptation of Jane Eyre.  I have always felt it is a very gothic style novel, and the TV adaptation definitely reflected that.  It included everything, but glossed over Jane's school life and early life in about 15 minutes, even though the things that happened then were important in her later life.  Now watching "Lost in Austen", which is a bit odd.


Used my tried and tested method of present buying.  I am always bad at buying presents, either they're late or non existent, and I always want to get something that the person will like.  So what I have done in the past is leave it to the last minute (often buying it just in the half hour before the birthday dinner) because the time pressures me to get something, and it always works.  So yesterday, I went out to get something for P's parents (P's brother's then girlfriend (now wife) got them a gift last year and I felt bad for not getting me anything, particularly when they got me some pretty earrings!) so I browsed Whole Foods and Muji, both unsuccessful endeavours, and then got the bus to Piccadilly, to visit Fortnum & Mason which is very extravagant but I got everything I needed.  I think it is akin to Harrods, in that it is very famous and its name is well known, so lots of tourists go in there, even though they do not buy anything.  This means they get in the way of people trying to buy things.  There is not that much space in F&M, or maybe it just felt like that because there were so many people!!  P thought highly of my gifts (I got some strawberry tea, a box of pomona soaked chocolate raisins, two boxes of shortbread, some fondant fancy things and a jar of lavender honey for them).. I like the bags.  They are Tiffany-colour-esque.


I still haven't gotten P anything, but we've decided not to get anything until after Christmas, so we can partake in the sales.  Neither of us had time either; I had an exam to study for on the Friday (which I confess I did not do much of....) and he had work and lots of parties....


♥ C


PS. Old school song I love + Sailor Moon video = amazing!  I loved Sailor Moon a crazy amount when I was young; I used to watch it in Chinese, so Japanese/English just feels wrong now.  I knew all her catch phrases and everything.  Haha.

Day 2 : 30 day blog challenge

Day 2 - a photo of something you ate today

I've never had mince pies before, but there was a meal deal on at a place we went to for dinner.  I always thought that mince pies had meat in them, and so never had them.  Since they are a very Christmassy food to eat, when I realised (only a few weeks ago), I thought I had to try one during the Christmas season! (Christmas season being December)

Here is a very in depth article about mince pies..  more than I wanted to know! :P

Carol xx

For more posts about the 30 day blog challenge, please click here!

l'hiver est ici

all images from google :)

there's something going on anywhere i go tonight

It has been a very full week this week, and I've been really glad to have a lie in :-)  I don't even know what it has been, but this week just seems to have been very hectic.  I am a little sad my Psychiatry attachment is over in 2 weeks; it seems to have flown by.

One of my friends spent a lot of money a few weeks ago for several reasons - nothing bad - and we were talking about money management, in a sort of roundabout way.  He told me he had £80 to live off for 12 days, and wasn't sure how he would manage it.  I am not sure if it is due to my thriftyness or frugality (?) but I am fairly sure I could manage on that amount for that length of time? (rent excluded)  Non rent shaped money just goes on travel and food, and then entertainment related things if there is money left over.  I just didn't understand why he thought he wouldn't be able to manage on that amount for so short a time.  Maybe people spend a lot more than me on things in general.  I buy lots of supermarket own brand things because it's cheaper and often it is a lot healthier too, but it still comes to a normal amount that you pay for food - I think I just buy a lot of it.

I try to budget every week, and unless I need to buy a travelcard for the month, I usually manage alright.  I would not say that money is there to be spent, and I do not think that experience of having no money makes you more likely to spend it more.  I do NOT come from a rich family, whatever things may seem like.  My family does NOT have much money, and the money that I do have has come about from lots of saving, and not buying expensive things, not spending more than I need to on things and being smart with investing.  Money I have to spend on things I like comes about from me budgeting for myself, and being strict with myself about spending on certain things.

So whilst I might /want/ a Vivienne Westwood purse or a bag from ASOS or whatever, these wants are mostly fleeting, and I realise it would not bring me much enjoyment from buying these things, as I could have spent the money better.  I do think that growing up in an enivronment where the importance of money is made very clear from a young age is hugely beneficial - the things I have wanted / needed in the past that cost a bit of money have come at a price.

Whilst I sometimes lament the fact that I don't get physical gifts for my birthday or for Christmas, I then think that there isn't anything I would want anyway.  Now I am (in body) an adult, I feel as though I am responsible for buying the things I want for myself, and so I usually only ask for things from my parents rarely, and if I can't afford it, or if there has been some special occasion, like A Level results.  But not receiving physical gifts is fine now... I haven't gotten anything for Christmas for 5 or 6 years now, except gifts from P... I like getting gifts but it does not bother me that I don't get things.  I would never ask for something from my parents for Christmas, unless it was something I /needed/ as opposed to 'wanted'.  For the things I like, if I feel as though I can afford it, then I buy it for myself, as a gift for myself.  I bought my own birthday gifts, I can buy myself something little for Christmas.

Christmas is becoming more and more and more commercialised every year, and soon children will only associate this time of year with getting gifts, rather than what it actually means.  Because I am not a Christian, the Christmas period now means a time when I can go and see my family - a rarity in itself.  I value that significantly higher than any physical thing I could ever receive.  I don't like how stores are putting out their Christmas things out so early, trying to get people to buy things.  Christmas is NOT about spending crazy amounts of money.

Without the need to preface this paragraph, as I think I have addressed it elsewhere, I don't like to be told, 'oh, you won't like 'x' because you're a girl'.. well, why don't you ask me my opinion first before you assume what I think about it?

And lastly, hope you're all well!  Time for bed now!

Carol xx

collective maths A Levels?

These past few days, I haven't been feeling that good... I've stayed in a lot, out of the sun, and been reading through my pile of books.  At the start of the BSc year, I bought a pile of books and added to it throughout the year.  Now I just have 5 left to go.  I have also been sleeping a lot, napping during the day, hand washing my clothes - why didn't I do this before???  Probably because they take ages to dry.  I have also been watching some films, and writing a little bit on my other blog.  I watched Toy Story 3 and Shrek 4 last week, just before I left for London.  I highly recommend the former, the latter... not that much.  Tomorrow, I better get better, because I'm going to the Tate Modern with a friend, whom I haven't seen for 2.5 years, then coffee with T and then dinner with friends later.

During one of my many naps, I had a really weird dream, about some of my old school friends :/

I was in a church, except it looked sort of like a lecture theatre, with those pull down chairs and white thin desks in rows that get lower and lower as you go down the room.  They had those big glass windows, with coloured panes, and it was painted white and sort of rustic.  It was sort of for a Founders Day type ceremony (for my school, it was a celebration of the founding of the Boys School, which came before the Girls School), and we stuck a load of pictures onto the wall.. sort of, commemorative ones.  It was very brightly lit, and around me were my friends from school.. some I was close to, some I was not.  There was no service and there seemed to be some speaker who was telling us about his clothes store - I do actually know him in real life, although not that well.  He's doing GDL - and how they were different to normal sizing in the UK... here we have even numbers, like 12, 14, 16 etc. for women's clothing.


So he was like, okay I can see that the numbering might confuse you a bit.  If you tell me what your size is in normal UK measurements, I can translate that to those for my store.  So he went around the group - there must have been about 20 in total.  So eventually he came round to me, and I was trying to whisper my size(s) to him, but he couldn't here, so I was like, "fine. 4 and 6" (not that they are my sizes in real life) and they translated to 27 and 29.


I must have been the last one to ask, as then I turned to the wall and took down the pictures we had just put up onto the wall and passed them to my friends K and G.  We then left the church, and walked back to school.  On the way, we recollected that we had exams in the summer, but we had been let off class for study leave from the start of the Easter holiday.  S then said that this meant that we had half a term to revise for a few exams, like Biology and Chemistry and Maths.  This was a huge surprise to me, as I said to her, "I'M DOING MATHS A LEVEL??!?!!!" to which she calmly replied "yes".  K and G and F also forgot they had Maths A Level exams, but the S told us that the viva we had just been for (yeah, somehow the group non-service/chat/conversation turned into a viva) was the only thing we needed to come to school for, for the rest of the year until exams.


I think the shock of finding out I was doing dream Maths A Level shocked me into waking up. :/






xo

a patchwork of emotion

I had about five minutes of anger/annoyance today... over something silly.  Basically, I wanted to print some stuff out, but my sister's laptop and mine seem to be not compatible, in that she uses Windows. (Hey, I'd put Linux on it if I knew how; I've got the discs and everything)  So her laptop wants to reformat my USB stick every single time she copies a film or some pictures for me.... gr... so I could access my files on Linux, but not on Windows.  It is silly things like this that make me eternally grateful that I don't use Windows, and its only redeeming feature is Microsoft Office.


Had to go into uni today, as I had scheduled an interview with someone... where I just rambled on and on, and I'm not entirely sure she got the idea.  It was very warm, and there were LOADS of people on the Queen's Lawn.  Possibly even more than during term time. (????)  Sorted some things out for university (starts on Monday... sob) and tried to avoid overheating.


I also discovered two Easter eggs in my cupboard!!!  They were right at the top at the back - this was probably so I did not eat them in one sitting.  I bought loads at Easter (by "loads", I mean 10) so now I can enjoy them, except they're melting.  But I hate eating cold chocolate.  Speaking of food, there is NOTHING in my fridge.  I am not entirely sure how I have been functioning these past few days.. what with my wrist sprain from opening a tin.


Anyway... check it outttt....







One of the best voices I have heard in a very long time.


Hope you are all well!
xo

who said it was better to have loved and lost?

Back in London now!  My flat looked very suspiciously tidier than I remember leaving it... tidied up a bit, still got clothes all over the place, but I'm too tired to fix it.  I had a nap during the daytime for the first time in ages: I used to get really tired by the afternoon, back in those days where I didn't eat so much.  But then those stupid horn things they have at the World Cup woke me up: my next door neighbour was watching the other football match that was on today.  Well, England v Germany.. I am not one bit surprised.  I didn't think England deserved to get through to the final 16; their total effort thusfar has been poor.

When I was at home in the shop, I was hot a lot of the time, because of the cooking and machinery and general running about.  My flat is cooler, but I need to keep my window open all the time, otherwise I feel really faint.  This excess heat is just too much for me :(  I don't think I can face going out tomorrow; it NEEDS to cool down NOW :/

Have over 100 GB of things to watch... basically, I just download lots when I am at home, so I can watch films or tv shows during my time at uni when I feel like it.  My sister has also done something to my USB stick.. it's been formatted or somesuch weird thing, and now I can't delete or copy files to it????  Everything was so much simpler when I didn't try to use Windows.

I'm not really looking forward to having to wear sunscreen again.  For the most part, I stay inside during the most sunny hours when you're meant to wear it, and I've only had sunburn once in my life... I don't really tan much, so now I look white.  Except I have Chinese colouring.  But I don't like the feeling of sunscreen and the smell of it, and also the constant need to reapply it.

Sometimes I get really irrational and think that things between the boy and I will be weird when he comes back.  It's hard having very little contact.  You know how in emails, or texts, you can "hear" a person's voice, as if they were actually saying the words they've written?  I don't feel that.  A large part of our relationship is tactile or verbally communicated, and it's difficult to be without my bestest friend for a long time.  I have been promised gifts, and I came back today to find a postcard, which everyone in my house and the postman and everyone involved in its delivery process has probably read.


I adore this song.  It gives me chills.  Just as well, as I need cooling down.


xo

now it seems to me that you know just what to say

in that lonely time, you told me to be stronger (dA: curioso)

So I'm up doing some stuff at the moment, various bits and pieces, so it occurred to me that I hadn't written here for ages.  Thank you to all those people who keep checking back constantly to see if there's a new post!  I just felt that after posting every day in April, I'd lost my blogging ability.  It got hard for a while trying to decide what to blog about... seriously, my life is not that exciting, or interesting.  So I thought I'd take a break, pursue other writing interests and also use that time to focus on my uni work.  But it's late, I'm not working right now, I thought I'd take a few minutes to write here!


Life's been a bit strange for me recently.  I've faced the fact that I will be without my boy for a while, as he travels the world in search of himself, in search of answers for the future.  He's been surveying hills, paragliding next to eagles, manning the internet shop in Bir, getting bitten by insects... I wish he kept a travel blog, so I'd know what he's been up to.  Largely, he has been reticent over his fun times in India, but I suspect this might be because he's writing it down, and he'll be able to tell me hours-worth of stories when he returns.  It makes me happy to read his emails, small comfort that they are.


I love hearing other people's experiences, I love learning new things about my friends, and I love that they can learn more about themselves.  I know I could never leave my life behind for 6 months, for the greater good.  I'm too selfish to do that, and so I admire his strength.  I won't pretend I find it easy that he's away.  Sometimes I need a shoulder to have a serious cry on, or a big hug, or just.. someone to talk to (I've been more reticent recently I feel.  I feel like I'm changing: I want to become a better person in these next few months.  I'm becoming less materialistic: I am making the most of what I have, which is why I've been wearing clothes that I've not worn for a few months or for a year or two (they're still clean. The place I get them done at is awesome). I'm becoming more aware of my effect on the environment, and learning (albeit slowly) about politics and the environment.  I've been writing more and more - here and on paper.... Is this what growing up is like?  When you realise that things are different and it happened without you noticing?


In terms of uni, I've been pretty busy, but happy.  I finish soon, and I am going home next Saturday.  I can't wait, because I really need to see my family.  My time at home is becoming shorter and shorter, and I need to see for myself that my parents are okay.  Sometimes it makes me upset when I think about just how much my parents have sacrificed for me to have my education.  Small things are making me upset.  Without someone to share everything with, I feel like all my emotion gets pent up, and it gets too much for me sometimes.  But I've been finding it hard to articulate out loud how I feel (this is an extension of "out loud")... that's another reason why I've not written here for a little while.  My mood has been fluctuating a lot recently and I've not known what to do to make it okay.  This has frustrated me, as I didn't want to publish a shabby post which had no meaning at all.


My summer is significantly shorter than it has been for a long long long time.  At primary school, we had 6 weeks of summer holiday.  When I left after year 4 finished, my new summer holidays were much longer.  At university, they were just crazily long.  But now it's shorter again, and I hope to get lots done.  There are so many books I want to read - I've been putting off reading some for months and months now... there are so many people I want to see while I'm home, there's a lot I need and want to do.  But I'm excited for the next year to begin.


Usually, I don't follow fashion.  A lot of the things in the shops don't suit me - I usually hate shopping for clothes/shoes.  But I've been floating around in a maxi dress which has substituted as my nightdress for about a week now.  For the most part, I wear a lot of the same clothes.... maybe the same.... month or two month's worth?  But I've been finding older clothes that I own, to mix it up.


I also had the weirdest dream this morning, almost like a nightmare, about a battle between the Greeks and the Romans.  It scared me into waking up :/


I've also become a serious geek for the environment.  Most aspects of life are underpinned by the environment.  That's probably all I'll say on the matter here....  Also, my whole weight issue has moved forward.  I looked in the mirror about a month ago and realised I look a little skeletal. When I lie down, my hip bones jut out at some weird-looking angle.  It feels weird.  Not much progress but.... small baby steps..


Yeah, life's not been wildly noteworthy... but I will try and write some more.  I have ideas that aren't that much formulated for other posts, so watch this space!!


The title, picture and quote in this post was what I was going to originally post, to reflect my feeling lonely, but I've kinda snapped out of the emo-ness and expanded it to include all of this!  Enjoy! And comment! xo

but words are only words,

can you show me something else?

can you swear to me that you'll always be this way,

show me how you feel, more than ever

we're not going on a summer holiday....

....as I have class starting in July!


Many people have been travelling, either in the summer holidays or in their gap years or generally.  In my summers, I've not been travelling.  I've been working and relaxing and seeing friends and writing.  And sort of now, I wish I had taken some time to go and travel around and see other cultures.


I've been to Europe, but that's all.  Hey, I have to expand my horizons slowly!  I'd love to visit some of the European cities for holiday breaks.  What I love about summer is the way it makes me feel... happy, young and lively.  People are generally more happy when they're getting their doses of Vitamin D :)

holiday daydreaming

Let's go to Nice....

and laze on the beach....

and eat French food....

and buy pretty clothes

xo


(images are all findable via googleimages)

i complain a lot... don't i?

I dislike how major holidays have become huge money-spinning ideas for companies.  Now I know I have many many Easter eggs, but the more I think about it, the more it is just for the chocolate, not what it represents.  Shops push Easter stuff as soon as Valentine's Day is over.  Then it's barbecue time.  Then it's Christmas.  Then it's Valentine's Day.  Since when did these days become about what you buy?


To me, it's not about what you can buy for someone for a holiday or celebrated day.  You get toys for every occasion, and chocolates and drinks and trinkets and all sorts.  Since when did you need earrings with little Christmas trees, or things saying "I love you" on that you'll appreciate for about five minutes and then discard?


I just wish.... we focussed more on what's important: love and friendship.  Christmas and Easter are religious festivals, which have been turned into profit earners for companies who just want money.  Now I feel like a lot of people now just think of Christmas and Easter as receiving presents.  It saddens me.  I don't feel like I need to get people Christmas gifts.  They have my love to appreciate.

you won't be lonely

Had one of the best weekends ever.  It might be silly, but P and I celebrate, or at least recognise, every month we have been together; on Saturday, it was 29 months.  It was lovely to do something, particularly as for the next 6 or 7 months, we won't see each other.  We both used to live in student halls.  It is very lovely there, although it was mostly in development when we were there.  We walked back there, and had lunch in a gastro-pub just off the King's Road, called Lots Road Pub.  It was one of the best meals I have had in a pub :)


R and I are always saying we should go to places for lunch/dinner; this should be one of them.  I can't believe how much of Imperial Wharf has changed.


I joined the Kensington library (finally) and got some chicklit books out, the intellectual books I wanted to get out were already taken out. (1984 and Fatherland) So we went home and read.  I slept lots and lots over the weekend, and watched Friends.  I'm on the penultimate episode now... almost there.  Then we went for dinner at the house of one of P's friends; he lives in Parson's Green, and we watched Canada finally beat America in the ice hockey Winter Olympics final... it was such a good game :)


Spring looks like it is finally here :)  Time to get the summery clothes out!! (although, the majority of my wardrobe is summery, and it becomes winter-wearable by the addition of jumper.


I loooove this song so much.  I worked out how to convert videos from youtube to mp3 songs, so I did it for this, now I play it lots and lots.  It's a cover version of a song by Jay Sean, which I don't think is as good.  But check this version out:



















































And lastly, I think the NaBloPoMo people are checking my blog.  I wanted to say I give up on March.  I've not been able to post everyday, and I know that we're meant to!  I'll do it in April!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chinese New Year and Valentine's Day!

Firstly, happy Chinese New Year / Spring Festival to everyone.  I hope this year brings you love and happiness.


It's also Valentine's Day... Not really doing anything special.  Just had a really nice relaxed weekend - first one in months - and I'm going to cook my special Chinese New Year meal tonight for us.  We had brunch in Giraffe yesterday, where I always have the veggie brunch if it's the right time: it's so yummy, and always makes me feel as though I should bother to cook a cooked breakfast in the morning.  P continued to organise his time away, and I did some work and wrote an EMQ test for the OSCE tutees I have on Wednesday.  Watched Friends (still not finished the boxset yet, although watching 6.5 seasons during January until 10th Feb is rather impressive, seeing as though each season is over 8 hours long :)


Special thankyou to P, who fed me and kept me sane during my whole BSc revision stressing/exam period/study leave.  Love xx

my 2009 and my hopes for 2010

 2009 has gone by very quickly!  I'm going to try and list all the big (and little) things that happened, but I am sure I'll forget lots of them.  2009, according to that fountain of wisdom, Wikipedia, was The International Year of Astronomy and Of Natural Fibres.


JANUARY
- New Year :)
- Gaza War continues :(
- Obama becomes President.. America breathes sigh of relief, hoping their worldwide image will be restored
- back in London on 3rd Jan, ready for pretty much 20 weeks of firms in one go
- get organised... buy a real size Cheese and Onion, a bag to carry it around in, have a jumper to wear on firms, start working for real

not so hard at work

- see Cirque de Soleil.... great acrobatics and scenery!

from google images

from google images

- do my first whole day on call, a week later followed by a whole night on call... realise I am missing Boys Like Girls, but would put my night on call experience above any concert
- see my very first C sections :)
- visit and dislike Westfield

FEBRUARY
- snow day!  2-2-09...  I was practically the only student who went into firms that day... it didn't occur to me that I should just stay at home, when my jeans were soaked all the way through and my socks and trainers were drenched... took me 2 hours to get in, and 2 hours to go home
- on same snow day, buy first 3 twilight books, proceed to fall in love
- lovely Valentine's Day
- I's birthday... enjoy Confessions of a Shopaholic very much and feel closer to Isma again after not seeing her for so long and feel less guilty that I didn't keep in better touch

Pizza Express

MARCH
- N's amazing 21st birthday dinner in Hampstead.  I think everyone put so much effort in because the dinner was free!

L-R: Pink Lady, Cowgirl, gangster, Sailor Mars, gangster #2, detective

- London Fashion Weekend - buy Juicy Couture shoes :D
- end of first 10 week firm... got on very well with them all

sleeping after long day's work.. that IS actually me

- summer electives sorted


APRIL
- get #1 score on webct - enough time has passed so I can tell people.  Hope Prof M does not realise it is me on his firm and that I am the one who got #1
- M begins to call me number 1, with his itouch lighter flame

M in SAF

- realise I have become less tolerant of people who annoy me
- realise who my true friends are
- become closer friends with T, who I knew before but not that well.  I hope I have been as good a friend to you as you have to me
- exam panic (first of many)
- swine flu comes, initially is a big threat.  I was never scared of it


MAY
- buy tons of emergency food :)
- discover beauty department at the whole foods market
-  p goes away around exam time, find it very difficult to balance life and stress
- exams


JUNE
- Britney at the o2!

 


- As You Like It at the Globe
- Milan :)  Best holiday ever.
- decide to learn dance to Gee by SNSD... only actively do something about it in December

JUNE
-  see Star Trek :) one of the best films of the year
- stupid tfl strike disrupting my birthday dinner
- time to read all the books that have been piling up on my table
- break phone #1
- have a great time in chelwest A&E (as in, service was good)
- Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett pass away :(


JULY
- find out results of exams sat outside Pret on Regent Street, using M's itouch
- anaesthesia elective - fun helping people anaesthetise.... see loads of babies being born, get to do loads and loads and meet some cool people :)

- 21st birthday :D

AUGUST
- O&G elective - even more babies, get to be "assistant surgeon" in the records, clerk gynaecology patients, despite having no knowledge of said speciality
- make goals to do before I'm 30
- some American disses our NHS :(


SEPTEMBER
- boyfriend finishes thesis
- start BSc - initially exciting, initially do no work
- see District 9 - good but too graphic, challenged my ideas of prejudice


OCTOBER
- learn to belly dance
- start to rectify lack of ever attending a wedding, encourage friends to get married
- see Disney on Ice :)
- realise who my true friends are, part 2

NOVEMBER
- break phone #2
- get coat that will protect me from the rain
- P becomes doctor... one of the best candidates his examiner has examined

DECEMBER
- Christmas
- got proper phone :)
- Brittany Murphy passed away
- too much snow... freeze and shiver half a stone off




- - - -


I saw this "10 years ago..." thing on someone's facebook status, and thought I'd do it here. So... 10 years ago.....


I had no computer or mobile phone, having no real need of them.  If I needed to find out something, I used to go to the school library.  I only had a vague concept of the Internet and had hardly ever used it.  I had never kissed a boy.  I had short hair and didn't think I was fat.  I had no idea what I wanted to do when I was older, just that I wanted to be happy.  I kept a diary, all of which I still have somewhere.  I loved pop music and thought that only bad people used swear words.


How times have changed.


In 2010, I want to do something fulfilling, have fun, work hard, enjoy life and carry on learning to bellydance.  I will learn the beginning of the dance to Gee.  I'll try to enjoy Pathology.  I'll keep in touch better with my friends, and be a better daughter, and a better girlfriend.  I will also try to realise that taking time off from working does not always mean slacking.


In 10 years time... I will be 31 (old :( ).... I want to attain all my "before I'm 30" goals (see sidebar) and I want to look back and think how good this decade was.




All photos are my own unless stated.